“Soup.”
“Medicine.”
“She couldn’t hold things.”
There it was again.
Medicine.
Clara kept her voice gentle.
“What medicine?”
“Green bottle.”
Her heart stopped.
Not brown.
Green.
“Where?”
“Doctor brought it.”
“What doctor?”
Ben shrugged.
“Town doctor?”
“No.”
“Mr. Vale’s doctor.”
Clara felt cold.
“Do you remember his name?”
Ben thought.
“Mr. Harrow.”
Clara had never heard it.
“What did he look like?”
“Old.”
Everyone over thirty was old to Ben.
“Beard?”
“Yes.”
“White?”
“Some.”
“Anything else?”
“He smelled like horses.”
Useless.
But something.
Clara smiled.
“Will you come downstairs?”
Ben looked uncertain.
“Is Papa sad?”
“Yes.”
“Because me?”
“No.”
“Because he misses your mother.”
Ben crawled fully out.
“He always misses her.”
“I know.”
“Do you?”
“I never met her.”
He looked surprised.
“You have her quilt.”
“Yes.”
“She made good quilts.”
“I noticed.”
Ben stood.
Then looked at Clara.
“Are you leaving?”
The question was quiet.
Not accusatory like Ethan’s.
Worse.
She answered carefully.
“Not tonight.”
His face fell.
Clara continued.
“And not tomorrow.”
A little hope.
“I promised myself four days before I decide anything.”
“Four?”
“Yes.”
He counted on his fingers.
“That’s not much.”
“No.”
“But it’s more than tonight.”
He nodded.
Then reached for her hand.
Clara let him.
Downstairs, Nathan saw them return.
Ben released Clara immediately and ran to him.
Nathan crouched.
The child hugged his neck.
“I spilled.”
“I know.”
“I’m sorry.”
Nathan held him tighter.
“I know.”
“Are you mad?”
“No.”
“Sad?”
Nathan closed his eyes.
“Yes.”
Ben whispered:
“Okay.”
That simple acceptance broke something open.
Nathan cried.
Quietly.
In front of all of them.
Nobody moved.
Then Lucy left her chair and joined the hug.
Rose followed.
Samuel pretended not to for ten seconds.
Then joined.
Ethan remained seated longest.
Finally Nathan held out one arm.
The boy looked away.
Then stood.
Clara watched from beside the stove.
No one invited her into the embrace.
Good.
It was not hers.
Not yet.
Maybe never.
And for the first time she understood what Mara meant.
Do not make them love you.
Let them choose.
That night, Clara slept badly.
She dreamed of green bottles and trains leaving without her.
At dawn she woke to voices outside.
Nathan and Ethan near the barn.
Arguing.
Clara dressed and went down.
The kitchen was empty except for Samuel reading beside the stove.
He looked up.
“They’re fighting about me.”