“You decided we were staying married.”
“Yes.”
“You decided I might raise his child.”
“Yes.”
“You decided to lie about paternity.”
“Yes.”
Each yes made me colder.
Finally I asked:
“Who is Dr. Levin?”
“My therapist.”
“How long?”
“Four months.”
Another secret.
“Why didn’t I know?”
“Because I wanted something that was mine.”
“Did she tell you to test me?”
“No.”
“What did she say?”
“Not to.”
“Specifically?”
“Yes.”
“And you did it anyway.”
“Yes.”
I stood and walked toward the hotel window.
“Why are you telling the truth now?”
“Because there’s nothing left to protect.”
I looked at my reflection.
“That’s not true.”
“What?”
“You’re still trying to protect us.”
Claire said nothing.
I continued:
“You wrote that letter because part of you believed revealing the baby might be mine would bring me back.”
“I hoped.”
“Exactly.”
Another silence.
I said:
“I’m not coming home tonight.”
“Okay.”
“I’m speaking to a lawyer.”
Claire inhaled sharply.
“Ethan.”
“That is not a threat.”
“I need information.”
“Please don’t file anything.”
“I didn’t say I was.”
“Please.”
“Claire.”
She stopped.
“I need time that you do not control.”
She whispered:
“Okay.”
That was the first time she gave me space without argument.
I hung up.
For the next five days, we communicated only through text about practical matters.
Bills.
Mail.
The dog.
We had no children, but we had a six-year-old shepherd mix named Jasper who had apparently become Switzerland.
Claire wanted him home.
I wanted him with me.
We compromised by leaving him with Mara for several days because neither of us was stable enough to pretend the dog was not absorbing tension.
On the sixth day, Claire asked to meet.
Not at the house.
Not at my hotel.
Neutral place.
A quiet café near the river.
I agreed.
She arrived before me.
No makeup.
Jeans.
Sweater.
Hair tied back.
For the first time since the pregnancy test, she did not look composed.
She stood when I approached.
“Hi.”
“Hi.”
We sat.
Claire looked at my left hand.
No ring.
Her eyes filled.
I noticed she still wore hers.
I hated noticing.
“I’m not here to decide anything today,” I said.
“I know.”
“I’m here because I need the full story.”
Claire nodded.
“I’ll tell you.”